Nice October Surprise, McCain October 8, 2008
Last night me and the neighbors got together for a drinking game during the presidential debate. We brought our shot glasses, and there was Captain Morgan, Jack Daniels, and some other girly liquor that was good in between the Captain and Jack. We decided on half shots so we wouldn’t get too wasted. I picked the keywords that we would drink on, and they were maverick, Main Street, and change. Well jeez, they must’ve wised up since the last one because those words were not flying like they usually do. So about 8ish minutes into the debate, after only doing one shot to McCain’s use of “Main Street,” we decided we needed to add a little more. They looked to me, so I said drink when Obama blames something on Bush, and drink when McCain says “my friends.” Well, shit, didn’t McCain start saying that every time he opened his mouth. We got trashed and we stopped drinking about half way through the debate.
Final tally (although I lost count of use of “my friends”):
Main Street: Once, McCain
Change: Once, Obama
Maverick: zero
Obama blaming something on Bush: once
My friends: at least 8
So I can blame my drunkenness on McCain. I mean, it got to the point where every time McCain would say “my friends,” we would all groan. This is one more thing I can blame on McCain. Not only did I get trashed, but I woke up this morning and was possibly still drunk (I know I wasn’t, but it sure felt shitty). Going to work was not fun for about the first two hours not including the commute. Thank goodness I had chased every shot with water so I didn’t have a headache.
How’s that for an October surprise? I’ll get you drunk!
Thank God It’s Payday July 3, 2008
This is what I saw when I was filling up my gas tank today:
$3.33
0.8 gallons
Your approved limit has been reached.
Four miles later, my “low gas” light turned on again.
Completely Random April 10, 2008
I need to find a couch. It looks like I’m going to stay in the current apartment, and the couches are going with my roommate. I’m trying to find a good couch that’s not too expensive, but that really isn’t happening. Besides the usual (craigslist and whatnot) how do I find a used couch that’s cheap but not ugly? I found a new one that I fell in love with on Ikea, but it’s $750. Boo.
What to Eat When You’re Poor April 7, 2008
Lately, I’ve been eating rice topped with some mixture of beans and tomatoes. This combination can be surprisingly versatile.
Refried beans + diced tomatoes + taco mix + thyme
Red beans + diced tomatoes + allspice + thyme
pinto beans + diced tomatoes + tofu + allspice + thyme
Put these combinations on top of rice.
See how versatile?
Also, try pasta.
Cheese is too expensive, so don’t try that. Vegetables can be expensive, depending on what kind you buy. If you do, you’ll have to stick with the simplicity of carrots or broccoli. Don’t even think about asparagus. Also, don’t go near the snack aisle, as you’ll end up getting broker and fatter. Sadly, beer is out of the question, unless you want Natural Ice or something else equally as disgusting and not worth the cheapness. Incidentally, tofu is cheap as well. It’s best to stick with things in cans, as two cans can cost under $1.00 and make a huge meal with leftovers.
The goal is to feel full and to make slight variations day-to-day in order to feel like you’re actually eating something different than you did yesterday. Spices help with this, but you should hope that they’re already in your pantry, because spices are expensive- typically $5 a pop. That’s almost four meals!
In conclusion: cans, rice, pasta, full, flavor.
Ok, so now there’s a segment on the nightly news about an Indian Orphanage. And now I feel guilty for writing this. Incidentally, they also eat rice everyday.
There Are Times When I Think Eugenics Would be a Good Thing March 6, 2008
I hate being in public spaces with stupid people. Most of the time when I hear people saying moronic things, I want to either slap them across the face or yell at them and tell them never to speak again. But alas, I am too nice or at least timid to do or say such things, so I just sit there and get angrier and occasionally direct angry faces in the stupid person’s direction. I’ve been told my stare has powerful qualities, but most of the time the stupid people are too busy spouting off idiocy to notice.
Evangelical Institution has masses and masses of stupid people. I was on the campus-run bus line today and overheard two horrible conversations. One was from a rather fat and ugly guy in glasses with a beard who, as I overheard him saying in a very loud, stupid voice, is a Communications major. He was talking about how he wants to write a book by the “Common Man.” According to him, his book would not even be original: he would just take a book by an “educated, learned” person and reinterpret it so that the “Common Man” would understand. It would be his very own interpretation and he apparently doesn’t care if he is right or if no one agrees with him. Who needs those educated people, right? They’re just pompous windbags (much like this stupid person who was speaking) with nothing to say to the common folk. Why not take some Derrida and make it his own?
The worst thing about the asinine conversations of stupid people is that they always think they need to talk as loud as they possibly can so that everyone in the room/bus/store can hear their brilliance and dedication to higher thought. I swear that the volume is directly proportionate to the stupidity of the speaker. You could even chart a z-line which would indicate the level of religiousity of the speaker. Most stupid people at Evangelical Institution are some kind of major which involves religion. Bonus points for being in seminary or other graduate institution related to religion. I would rate the above stupid person among the highest echelons of stupidity based on his volume and the fact that he is applying to Evangelical Institution’s seminary if “nothing else works out.”
Now I must listen to possibly the most stupid professor who was ever given a doctorate degree.
Justifications, Introductions, General Rambling March 5, 2008
I think my life can be generally classified at this point as really, really, lame. So I’m starting a blog that my friends have and I’m writing on it so that I can have some decent “human contact” for once in my life.
I used to write on xanga. But I pretty much stopped, and no one reads it anymore, so I’m starting a new one. There’s something about freshness and an actual audience that makes me want to write. Plus, the old xanga one was being stalked by people I don’t want stalking me, I started in in high school and most of what I chose to write on it were lame, and I have a desire for internet anonymity. The fact that one of my old friends came to visit over the past few days made me realize how much decent human contact I don’t get anymore. Most of my days are spent hiding somewhere and reading a book/studying, going to work at my part-time job at Corporate Crap while I finish my undergraduate education at Evangelical Institution, and sleeping/eating. My phone conversations with my parents have consisted of “Well, nothing new going on except five new pages in my thesis” and generally I don’t talk on the phone at all with anyone else for reasons I am not sure of. This leaves me with more than 3,000 rollover minutes and a sense that I am hopelessly and irretrievably socially retarded. Thus the hopeless recluse. I have come to believe that, actually, my life is really not that exciting and no one would really want to hear/read/know about it, but my old friends are on here and maybe they can help me out with some intelligent blog banter. Thus the blog.
I live in Lameburg, and no one at Evangelical Institution is anyone that I can actually have a decent conversation with. It’s really quite annoying, because I think that the perceptions that everyone has about me make it impossible for them to relate to me or want to hang out with me anymore. I am several things which are not normal at my school: liberal, feminist, interested in doing well, intelligent (I think). Additionally, I am socially retarded, which makes it hard to have friends. Most of my attempts at socializing leave me feeling lame and out of the loop. Hell, my idea of a good Friday night is sitting on my couch with a beer reading a book. The other night I watched the New York Philharmonic’s North Korea concert on public television for fun. I can only hope that at some point in my life I can meet other people like me and live in a world of fellow liberal reclusives.
