I think my life can be generally classified at this point as really, really, lame. So I’m starting a blog that my friends have and I’m writing on it so that I can have some decent “human contact” for once in my life.
I used to write on xanga. But I pretty much stopped, and no one reads it anymore, so I’m starting a new one. There’s something about freshness and an actual audience that makes me want to write. Plus, the old xanga one was being stalked by people I don’t want stalking me, I started in in high school and most of what I chose to write on it were lame, and I have a desire for internet anonymity. The fact that one of my old friends came to visit over the past few days made me realize how much decent human contact I don’t get anymore. Most of my days are spent hiding somewhere and reading a book/studying, going to work at my part-time job at Corporate Crap while I finish my undergraduate education at Evangelical Institution, and sleeping/eating. My phone conversations with my parents have consisted of “Well, nothing new going on except five new pages in my thesis” and generally I don’t talk on the phone at all with anyone else for reasons I am not sure of. This leaves me with more than 3,000 rollover minutes and a sense that I am hopelessly and irretrievably socially retarded. Thus the hopeless recluse. I have come to believe that, actually, my life is really not that exciting and no one would really want to hear/read/know about it, but my old friends are on here and maybe they can help me out with some intelligent blog banter. Thus the blog.
I live in Lameburg, and no one at Evangelical Institution is anyone that I can actually have a decent conversation with. It’s really quite annoying, because I think that the perceptions that everyone has about me make it impossible for them to relate to me or want to hang out with me anymore. I am several things which are not normal at my school: liberal, feminist, interested in doing well, intelligent (I think). Additionally, I am socially retarded, which makes it hard to have friends. Most of my attempts at socializing leave me feeling lame and out of the loop. Hell, my idea of a good Friday night is sitting on my couch with a beer reading a book. The other night I watched the New York Philharmonic’s North Korea concert on public television for fun. I can only hope that at some point in my life I can meet other people like me and live in a world of fellow liberal reclusives.
